Many relationships start out perfectly well, but after some time, the lovers begin to drift apart even before either of them realizes what’s happening.
Several couples experience the same feeling, where they love their partner but can’t imagine getting married to them. Only a few relationships happily stand the test of time.
When you fall in love with someone, the infatuation both of you experience towards each other would help keeps the relationship going strong. However, once the excitement fades, the couple needs to make the subconscious determination to please each other and keep each other happy so the relationship can last.
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When one partner begins to believe that the relationship is choking them or preventing them from experiencing happiness, it’s only a matter of time before doubts set in.
10 real reasons why couples drift apart over time
When your partner starts avoiding your calls, remaining silent during conversation, or you just feel bored and restless in the relationship (both married and single), then you may be drifting apart from each other. You may not know the reasons or even when the drift started, but you can sense it from the unhappiness you feel in love.
Below are some reasons why most couples drift apart over time. Once you do find out where you or your partner is missing it, you can choose to correct it, or walk away for good.
Lack of communication
Communication is the greatest aspect of relationship that holds spouses together or tears them apart. If you are no longer talking to your partner the same way you once did at the onset of the relationship, then you are clearly drifting apart.
People change with time, and you may assume you know everything about your partner, they may have changed and they’re not the same person you once met several years ago.
Issues of incompatibility may occur over the years, or immediately after the infatuation period. If you start to believe that both of you have nothing in common, you’ll only feel worse over time. It is best to test your compatibility at the start of the relationship, instead of trying to trying to shape your partner into your idea of the perfect spouse.
Many couples drift apart, not because they don’t love each other, but because they subdue how they truly feel about the things that concerns their partners. Does your partner ever tell you to dream big, or quit your job and find something better? Your partner would assume they’re communicating with you, and on the other hand, you would tell yourself that your partner can never understand you.
When you start getting really close to a colleague or an old friend of yours of the opposite sex, you may be drifting apart from your partner. Sometimes, you may not realize that you are confiding more to a friend than your own partner.
For a relationship to grow, both partners have to take an active interest in pleasing each other. When you don’t take initiative in love, both of you may begin to take each other for granted, and the relationship would start to deteriorate. You can plan sexy dates, go on vacations, or tease each other and have fun. And most importantly, try to create memories every day.
Sex is a very important part of romance and love for a relationship to thrive. If you’re not trying hard enough to keep the sexual excitement on a high, you’d find yourself bored with your relationship. You may think you’re content with the lack of sexual intimacy, but you begin to drift apart in no time.
Lack of time for each other
Your relationship will end soonest if you both don’t make out time for each other. At first maybe because of the nature of your work, both of you may miss each other. But as the months pass by, both of you will learn to live without each other. And before either of you know it, both of you as individuals would be completely capable of leading your own lives without having the other person in it.
You and your partner may decide to chase different aspirations and interests in life. The relationship may still seem happy and perfect for a while. If you believe your relationship is perfect, even if both of you don’t do anything new, but your partner on the other hand believes they’re stuck in a choking rut, these are differences that can make both of you drift apart.
If you no longer connect with your partner emotionally or want him/her to be the first to tell any news, or just feel happy taking to them about your day, then it points to the fact that both of you are gradually falling apart. Lack of emotional intimacy in relationship will force one or both of you to keep an emotional or sexual affair with other people.
Buildup of resentments
Do you ever feel like your partner’s not good enough for you? Displeasures are left unattended to by both partner leads to resentments and anger. This can accumulate and cause you to be unhappy in the relationship.