How to Manage Anger in Marriage Based on Scriptures

Marriage involves a man and a woman from different backgrounds, personalities, and preferences living under same roof as man and wife. It won’t be rosy all the time, there are bound to irritating or infuriating moments between them as couple.

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Anger can be different in each marriage depending on how it’s expressed and managed. Marriage provides plenty of motivation to learn about anger and how to manage it efficiently. Here are a few situations to ruminate:

Increased conflict from not sharing responsibilities

Tension in marriage could be caused by different situations. A couple with children may become tensed up by pressure from the kids, especially when only one partner is left to carter for the ever-increasing needs of the children. A man should not solely leave the duty of waking up to feed their young toddler at night to his wife alone, it should be a joint effort. The wife may react if she has to do everything around the home including bathing the kids, cooking, washing, cleaning, and lots of other chores.

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The problem of angry outbursts in marriage

The primary emotions that causes conflicts in marriage are frustration, fear, or hurt. Anger is only a secondary emotion caused by these reactions.

God gave us a heart for our emotions and a brain for logical reasoning. Both affects how we make and take decisions and our general view of different circumstances affecting our lives and the world at large. However, without proper information, we are bound to make decisions that are only mind-bound or emotional, without the logical backings.

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Tackling anger issues in your marriage from scriptural perspective

It is vital to first evaluate how your marriage is doing and the problems in order to fortify and grow in love. If suppressing your anger or screaming out isn’t helping your marriage, then let the following biblical scriptures lead you:

Forgiveness (Ephesians 4:32)

As couples, you are bound to offend your partner. But as Christians, we are supposed to be kindhearted to one another, forgiving as Christ as forgiven our sins. When couple bear grudges against one another and live in unforgiveness, it may lead to the crash of the marriage. Forgiveness help us maintain a humble and compassionate attitude towards our spouses in the face of aggravating situations.

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Love is patient (1Corinthians 13:4)

You have to learn to tolerate your spouse’s inadequacies. Explosive rage destroys the love in marriage, thereby making the other partner feel emotionally traumatized, insecure and abused. You can get help from a Christian counselor, pastor, trusted friend or relative to help you if you’re struggling with anger issues in your marriage.

Communicate the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15)

If you have been offended by your spouse, expressing your anger may feel like the most logical thing to do. However, it won’t always end well. So, put yourself in order before telling your spouse how they’ve wronged you. As you communicate to them, let your heart be compassionately open in love and kindness.

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